(The conversation about the arrest of an Anabaptist person for sexual abuse of a child being hijacked to say child sexual abuse is no worse than “godly men having consensual affairs” is a problem. While affairs might be a sin, they are NOT a CRIME.This is a repetitive saga in the ongoing conversations about child abuse prevention and even perpetrators being arrested with an Anabaptist background. It is repetitive both in the narrative within the church and people who are Anabaptist Apostates. Blame Shifting is not helpful to protecting children.)
When someone is arrested for the crime of “sexually abusing a child” do not conflate it with the sin of ‘adultery’, only one of these is a crime. They are not, and have never been the same. I have watched it unfold REPEATEDLY, often with someone blackmailing people with threats of exposing adultery if they speak out against abuse.
Let me ask you this: What kind of people say well, this person's husband had an extramarital affair and they are (insert random anabaptist phrase here), as if raping a child and consensual sex between adults are even remotely the same things.
WE ARE CAUSING HARM WHEN WE CONFLATE THE TWO. Sex with a child is a CRIME. SEXUAL abuse of a child is a crime. Consensual sex between two adults is NOT A CRIME.
Why are we attacking women for the sins of their husbands? Why are we proclaiming it is the wife’s fault her husband abused a child?
Why do we protest and say Becky’s husband abused a child sexually because Becky didn’t give him enough sex? Why is his shifting blame a sign of repentance?
The goal is to not only change the conversation away from the crime of child sexual abuse, but to shift the blame for the abuse: His wife isn’t allowed to talk about child sexual abuse since she failed to uphold her marriage bed appropriately to prevent her husband from having an affair.
ONLY ONE OF THESE IS A CRIME! You are comparing adultery to A CRIME. Adultery has nothing in common with child sexual abuse. They are not the same. Hijacking a conversation to compare adultery to the CRIME of child sexual abuse makes you part of the problem.
You are perpetuating a narrative that benefits you on your pedestal of privilege as you sit there and attempt to protect the GODLY MAN from any consequences of his criminal activities.
Does it help you sleep at night to protect that poor innocent Godly man who has been going around by your own admission sexually abusing children for approximately a decade?
Have you held space for the survivors that have been harmed by this perpetrator? (and I do mean space that isn’t just you praying for them and/or telling them to forgive and/or maybe it's time to let it go, and/or any other equivalent of those terms?)
Have you raised funds for those survivors to have access to actually certified trauma therapists?
Have you given from your own household things to fill the survivors need?
What have you done for the survivors that required more effort than prayers?
If all of you could expend that same protective energy towards the survivors of child sexual abuse, imagine how quickly we would have so much less child sexual abuse? Choose your actions wisely friends, for they will show who you really are despite what your mouth proclaims and nothing screams unsafe more than words and actions not matching.
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